at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Randomize
