Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
