saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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