My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Randomize
