yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
