Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize