he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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