I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
