Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.