Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
