My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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