I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Randomize
