Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
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