I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize