i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
