I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
