I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
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I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
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I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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