How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
