How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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