Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
