How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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