Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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