did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Randomize
