I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
