If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Naked Twister starts at high noon
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
