There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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