This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
