I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
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We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize