Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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