I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Randomize
