mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize