you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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