? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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