I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
