I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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