The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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