i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
