How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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