Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
