haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Randomize
