But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
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They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
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Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
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