kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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