You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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