So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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