If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
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He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
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We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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