Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
You need Xanax blowdarts
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
