Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
