Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
