The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
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