I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
