Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
